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The Herald Review

Location: TriBeCa Café Bar, Dumbarton Road, Glasgow

102 Dumbarton Road, Glasgow Style: Shabby chic Food: High-end cafe fare Price: £6-£8 for a main course Wheelchair access: Yes We’re at the base of a bowl, bounded on one side by the Trossachs, the other by the Arrochar Alps.

What’s this got to do with the savoury confection on my plate the following day, though? Well, as far as I can tell, I’m simply scoffing a slightly-bigger-than-normal, healthily carbohydrate-heavy breakfast. Three runny poached eggs, hash browns (that crumble as all hash browns do), two rashers, a couple of herby Cumberland sossies (or rather sections of the real thing), mushrooms and toast. Two slices. White, no option offered by the waitress. The grilled half-tomato is the runt of the litter, as ever.

But it’s called a Manhattan. I mean, is Carlisle’s finest meat product – the one that looks like a well-fed pointer dog’s tollie – big in New York? Given that Manhattanites love their Scottish langoustines, perhaps it is and I ought to drag myself into the 21st century. Hopefully, you get my point, though.

And Tribeca, the NYC district synonymous with de Niro, lofts and the art scene? This is Dumbarton Road, in the West End of Glasgow, beyond the shop-front window, darkened by early summer rain, not Hudson Street. That aside, the food, or rather the stuff that matters, is luscious. Pricey for what would cost you a pound to make at home but on your table within five minutes of ordering. And no washing up. The Manhattan is simply superb, ditto Dave’s Meat Feast, which has more flesh and fewer eggs.

Throughout our Sunday brunch, twentysomething groups and couples come and go, some unwilling to wait for a table, and herein lies Tribeca’s greatest disadvantage – its size. We end up slap bang in the middle of the floor at the only empty table and it’s not especially conducive to relaxed grazing. Bums in your face, blasts of wind whenever the door opens, in full view of everybody, and at £7-odd for a decent platter? Which, when it arrives, barely fits on your shoogly table should your dining companion also have an appetite to rival Victoria Beckham’s after yet another month on a diet of Garibaldi biscuits and thin air?

It’s a shame, because Tribeca has everything going for it. Strong coffee, no thumping music, matchless comfort food (though avoid the waffles and syrup – straight from the packet and it shows), sturdy staff, cool punters. It’s even got a licence. But even just one dodgy table can make a small place uncomfortable, no matter what you call it.

 

Source – The Herald

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